Lazy

ONE WORD TO DESCRIBE MYSELF RIGHT NOW: LAZY

if my beloved SV know this, he'll killed me!!

Huh...down again

Hey Al-Qalb, hey my heart, hey my hati, hey, hey... what's wrong with you again?? Im trying hard to understand your condition right now heart. Why are you making feel down? it really upsets me. I dont want to be smiling fakely but have a gloomy heart inside. I pray to you Allah. I cried to you Allah. You who hold my heart. I pray to You Ya Allah...guide my heart to the right path...dont ever left me even less than a blink of an eye...

My SV

I have met my SV yesterday... I have lots to tell here in this blog of what happened to me everyday but since I have to jot each inch of this in english it...it turns out to be that i have nothing to tell...ahaha...can u guys understand?? (mcm la ramai yg bacakan...kalo adepun, fhiza je kot...hehe)

Well, back to the story... We talked alot about 1 hour...opss...not 'we' but my supervisor who does the talking while i prefer nodding more and add some 'yeah', 'that make sense' and 'ok'. haha...i keep repeating the same words...i have no idea what to talk...i mean i have the idea but it seems kinda hard to deliver it... so, howwwwwwwwwwwwww? i cant keep nodding for the upcoming 3 years right? i do some of talking but i myself cant believe what crap im talking about...hoho... so, i took an inisiative to go for the english class held by my school on every friday and it's FREE :p and I'm bad in writing too... i hope after taking this class, i can speak like "OMG Asma', is that you talking? how on earth that your bristish accent is so strong" ---> berangan je lebih...kahkah.

So, Im going to my first english class tomorrow morning...I hope i can make friends there

Oh regarding my SV...he's kind and looks kinda a good supervisor insyallah that can guide me through this 3 years journey...and he loves dateline ok which means every task have their datelines...and my first task is to submit a critical review on my research by end of this Jan...and that makes two weeks more left :( Bestkan dah ade keje...ahaha
Ok, mom...bye bye...miss u...

A highly motivated message!!

Thanks for yr e-mail.

Your PhD program has now just started. Pls adopt with the environment
quickly. Don't be to emotional and reduce the number of calling home.

2. The time move soft fast, the spring is on the way and then summer.
in UK academicians go away in august and september. So you must make sure
that something has been achieved before August.

3. Therefore, you must produce your plan of work at least for this year of 2011.

4. Now, you must built condusive environment, network of researchers of your
area, know well students under Prof. Berrie.

5. Be strong and keep high motivation continuously.

Thank you.

Coretan akhir tahun 2010

xkire2...kali ni wat n3 dlm bhs melayu je senang. sgt pelik kan. kat malaysia beriye la aku wat dlm b.i kan, dh smpai negara omputih, aku hentam pakai bm je...senang. haha... rindunye kat malaysia...ntahla...tatau nk kate feeling rase ape skng...sedih kot yg paling menguasai aku. mcm biasela aku kan. sedih je la memanjang tmbh2 jauh dr family. kwn pun xde. xde lg kwn2 yg boley ajak borak2, nk call, nk gosip2x...ah xde lagi. xjmpe lagi....aku ni dhla xreti nk kwn sgt. huhu...

alhamdulillah ramai sanak sedara yg menghantar. kata wana, mcm nk hntr org gi mekah. kalah family wana plus izal. hehehe... aku sgt terharu ngn kehadiran sanak sedara ke epot. tuhan je tahu betapa bersyukurnya aku di saat itu. pastu siap bg wang saku lagi. huhu... insyallah sy akan belajar baik2 di sini dan cepat2 habiskan. Ya Allah mudahkanlah urusanku. awal2 pg diorang dh bangun...kul 4 am kot....sian mereka. pastu, salam2 sume sedara, peluk cium adik2 pastu n umi n abah (boleh ke nangis mase tulih ni, walhal kat epot x nangis pun...nangis dlm hati je umi abah sbb xley nangis nnti umi abah mesti risau kan:( .....

suara abah dh sebak...umi dh nagis mase tu....aduh... alhamdulillah xdela nangis...wat kuat ni...kalo ikutkan hati mau x nangis! haha...pastu turun escalator...naik shuttlebas sbb train tgh renovate (ade ke time2 kau nk g renovate, x merase nek train...huhu)....pastu lambai2 kat sume...mcm dlm drama plak rase...

pastu atas kapal terbang duduk kat tepi tingkap. kalo mase naik air asia, tggnu--->k.l---->tggnu mestila rase mcm sonok thp x ingt sbb dpt duduk tepi tingkap (ley kire kot bape kali je dpt duduk tepi tingkap). tp lupe, naik flight 13 jam duk tepi tingkap sgt la x best. Sebab, susah la nk kuar masuk. dahla kebetulan kapal terbang yg naik tu penuh ngn mat salleh, mcm naik kapal diorang je padahal aku naik MAS kot. yg duduk sebelah aku, kapel mat salleh. hmm....nasib badanla asma' oii...paramugari MAS mcm suke layan mat saleh lebih dr aku je gaya. haha...perasaan aku je kot. sib baik ade pramugara yg baik hati. slalu gak tanye aku ok ke tak sepanjang 13 hours dlm flight tu. siap sembang2 mase nk turun kapal terbang bile dh landed kat heathrow. haha... fmily die siap wakil australia for badminton...aku pun tatau sejauh mane kebenarannya...haha. die kate kat malaysia xde peluang, so cr peluang di tempat lain. barula aku rase mcm aku naik kapal negara sendiri kan.... lupe nk cite bout mknn, hmm makanan nmpk mcm best, xpi kalo mkn sorang2 sume bende pun xbest kan....eh ke x? so, bg la pape pun kat aku mase tu, sume aku mkn mcm xrase pape....huhu. n 13 jam tu sgt la lameeeeeeeeeeee....puas dh aku main game kat atas kpl terbang tu, tgk cite, dgr mengaji (ade ayat2 Al-Quran atas kpl..menarik kan) tgk cite mawi, etc....xsampai2 jgk. tido xyah ckpla...bape kali kot aku tido...

akhirnya sampai jgk kat bumi uk jam 3.30pm waktu UK. heathrow mase tu baru bukak lepas tutup sehari sbb snow lebat. putih je aku nmpk heathrow. kalo ijau pelik la pulakkan...mestila tu kat somewhere else..uganda ke...nepal ke...ape aku merepek ni...ahaha. gelak sorang2. turun2 tu g imigresen security...tmpt nk cop2 passport...cuak gak...manela tau die mintak ape2, aku xde bende die mintak. pastu sampaila giliran aku nk cop passport...die tnyela student kat uni mane, wat bidang ape...so, jwbla. pastu, die suh aku g health check up. cess...kene gak. so, alhamdulillah aku dh bwk siap2 x-ray n medical check up. so, skjp je la. pastu g cop lagi skali. pahtu, mase dh nk siap die kate "u dont look like 26, well all the best for your study". dlm hati aku, maksudnya muke aku lagi tua dr 26, atau lg muda?? pkcik itu telah membuat aku bermain dengan persoalan hati....

dh cop2 passport, kenela gi amik luggage aku yg berat x hengat tu...xla berat pun...adela 22.4kg ke 24.7kg...haha...no xdekat langsung. amik2 beg je, lalu la kat lorong no goods to be declare...so lalu la....alhamdulillah tiada sebarang penahanan luggage utk di check. so, lepasla segala mcm brg makanan...

kuar2 je, dah ade adik2 tu tunggu. alhamdulillah. pastu adik2 tu bwk ke rumah mereka. so, jadilah aku duduk sementara di sini.

esoknye, terus g uni register student card ditemani oleh farah :) Adik yg sgt baik hati. Bwk aku g shopping sume. Beli sume kelengkapan. So, aku pun mula mengemas. oh lupe, dh sampai airport, aku call la rumah, sorang pun xangkat. Call hp pun xangkat. rupe2nye sume dh tido kepenatan sbb bangun awal pg kan nk hantar aku walaupun kat malaysia baru pukul 1am...hehe. baru ok...haha. awal2 pg esoknya, terus call umi n abah. abah terus sujud syukur sbb aku dh selamat sampai...epah bgtau la...umi nangis bile dgr suara anak die ni...hehe. (ala..ni malas tulis entri mcm ni...mesti ingt umi n abah :(

Ok, pastu 25hb hingga 1hb aku g jln2 UK...sbb ade boxing day....mcm2 tmpat la pegi. sgt2 la seronok....

lepastu, 4 hb start training prog utk postgrad school aku. boleh x aku nangis mase 1st day lepas balik dr postgrad training. what-the-what betol...haha...mcm budak tadika...budak tadika pun x mcm ni...hahaha. aku cume rase mcm terkejut. sbb sume lain. environment lain. kelas aku tu sume omputih hokay. esoknye baru aku cube berbual ngn mereka. kene tegor dulu rupenya. haha...adela kwn ngn italy, negro kot...tu pun sekadar formal...haha. seminggu kot training yg buhsan itu...training tu best je sbnrnye tp sbb aku xde kwn jd mcm xbpe nk best...training tu smbng lg khamis ni...hoho

nak g school aku tu, kene naik bas. dlm 20 minit jgk...jauh kan? haha. kalo main campus, 1 minit je dr rumah aku skng. sbb school aku tu kat hospital. bajet mcm budak medic la kan. dh jmpe dh ngn sv mase 4hb tu. rase mcm die ok...doa2lah die akan sentiasa ok begitu...die nmpk sgt10x kurus dr gmbr. aku pun ade hrpn mcm tu kot lepas dh work under supervision die nnti...ini sgt menarik...haha....oh ya, sume postgrad akan dpt satu laptop or desktop...kene choose. aku ingtkan dpt both...gile tamak...

so, mcm tu la serba sedikit kisah aku yg x bape nk best kat sini. sume tulih laju je nih. tulih tanpa pengolahan bahasa yg menarik pun. main tulih ikut yang teringat je. hehe...takut x tulih nnti, sampi bile pun x tulih. oh ya, lupe juga dh masuk tahun baru 2011. sekejap je dh masuk thn baru. umur pun dh meningkat!! haha...

p/s: byk mende x terbuat2 lg--> bile nk start hafal quran???

Just an update

It was a countless times that I ended up closing back my blog with no entry updates. I dont know where to get started as there's a lot of stories to be told. Well, now I'm in UK. There are mixture of feelings right now...haha. will be continue later... haha

Pea-Headge-Dee...a song maybe?

Ok...I dont know where to start. There's a lot of unexpected things that happen this past few weeks. From Sydney that I plan to go turns out to be Southampton that I'm heading too. How on the earth that did this happen? Fated. Full stop. Huhu... I pray to Allah that this will be the right path I'm walking through. Hopefully. Insyallah I will not regret what I have choose and I will never look back!!

I need to emphasize here that my FRIENDS are those that really inspired me until up to this stage. Without them, my life would be crazy enough that u cant imagine. They're the one that help me going through the hell of this study leave procedure. My housemates and my UMT's colleagues, you owned my big thanks... ignore all the english mistakes...but more than happy if anyone could correct it...hehe

Oh...and not to forget, my family too...especially Qi ;)


I will miss Malaysia :)

What the What

i thought that doing being phd is already tough, didnt expect that pre-phd is tough too...sigh~

Im lost in my little world...again.

Yes, I think my theory that i blog during im stress is definetly true.

And now, I totally just want to be a housewife. Eh? haha. What a mundane person I am. I miss homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

I hate the fact that I miss home, and my siblings too. We fought if we meet each other but still i miss them. I hope they find their path to glory.... I hope Lina and Luqman will get good scores for their exam. But dont feel down if it's not like what you expected because

1. you're lazy (haha...just joking here)
2. It's Allah wills


And do always remember,
"every cloud has a silver lining"

Zero idea

I have no idea for this entry but since it been left for awhile, I thought of just jotting anythings eventhough it's just a story bout an ant. what the heck im talking about here?? im just staring blankly at this entry. haha. i'll continue later.





But, what i know is that i miss my family so badly eventhough i had just come back from bangi a few days ago :((

I am sick

I am utterly sick of the world

I feel utterly sick amidst the harmony of my country

why??

I dont know the answer too

-------------------------------------------------------

end.

Post Eid 2010

I love the me right now

Uhh... I really dont know. My life is totally going upside down now but still not critical that my head would explode at anytime. I am messed up. Well, is it me to be blamed? Was I that dumb not to be well-prepared? Absolutely not! It's all fate. We plan, but Allah knows the rest.

It's all about furthering my study abroad. Why on the earth is it d**n hard to have my study abroad?? Be patient asma' and mind your language please. First, Alhamdulillah I already got the MOHE's scholarship to further abroad. The problem is that it's going to expire by 1 December 2010. For god's sake, cant MOHE be more relevant? Initially I was planning to study somewhere else not in Sydney and it turns out that MOHE didnt approve it.

So, I choose Sydney instead. The problem is Sydney has specific date to commence which will be either in July or March. Since I applied the scholarship in end of June, obviously I cant enroll for the July intake and have to go for the March intake the next year. And that surely will automatically burn the quota i'm holding right now. Ha!Ha! But, I believe that Allah knows the best. So, no worries.

Sometimes, life wont be that easily for us. Challenges, obstacles and etc. will teach us the meaning of strong and patient.

La tahzan guys! This whole world is only TEMPORARY. Be scared for the PERMANENT. And im the one that need to be reminded of that :(

A life without challenge would be like

going to school without lessons to learn.

Challenges come not to depress or get you down,

but to master and to grow and to unfold your abilities

Life is a bit hard these few days

Kinda...

hmm...

Salam Eidul Fitr

Bila ada kata terselip dusta,

ada sikap membekas lara dan langkah menoreh luka,

semoga masih ada maaf tersisa.

Taqabbalallahu minna waminkum.

Minal aidhin wal faidzin,

mohon maaf zahir dan batin